About the Experiment

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

And it starts!

The experiment has officially started, and I'm a little nervous but mostly really curious!

Mom had never been on OkCupid before, so I walked her through the site over the phone.  One of her first questions was, "Do you like dancing?" I like dancing, but it also depends on the type of music. When my parents were dating they went out dancing a lot, but it was all disco, now "going out dancing" can be EDM at a fancy Hollywood club or dancing to soul music at a local dive (yea to the latter, nay to the former).

We started filling in information for the Post-Modern Matchmaker profile, and it was funny the discussions and generational differences  it brought up.  I have often debated what Body Type option to select (OkCupid gives you the following options: Rather Not Say, Thin, Overweight, Skinny, Average, Fit, Athletic, Jacked, A Little Extra, Curvy, Full Figured, Used Up).  My mom thought we should put Curvy, and I laughed and told her that now Curvy usually implies you have quite a butt and I do not.  Average?  Or does Average have a negative connotation (especially in LA)?  Fit?  Or does that imply that I'm like a Fitness Model (I'm not).  I've also noticed that guys seem to have different definitions of body types for themselves than I do, which fits with gender norms of women being far more critical of bodies/weight than men.  We went with Average, as it seemed the least problematic.

My mom brought up that I've traveled a lot, and I told her that saying, "I like to travel" has become such a cliche, it's like saying, "I like music."  We worked on how to incorporate the information she felt was important while trying to avoid the cliches.  Mom suggested including that I work at the local community garden and I'd never even thought to write that in an online dating profile.  We looked at the OkCupid profile I've had off and on for years, and it's rather tongue-in-cheek (comedy=defense mechanism=duh).  With my mom's influence, the Post-Modern Matchmaker profile is more serious and/or genuine and I think it's a nice change.  We'll change the profile a bit with each Matchmaker, and for Mom week it's definitely More Heart and Less Snark.

We looked at a few guys' profiles, Mom was scandalized by some username that she dare not repeat, and it was hilarious to have a phone conversation with my mom that went, "Oh, do you think he's cute?  No, do you?"  As I mentioned previously, my mom and I don't usually talk much about my dating life, so she's trying to figure out who I'm into!  The dating age range she picked (28-33) is smaller than I would normally say, but I welcome these kind of changes.  I asked her what kind of guy she thinks would be a good fit for me, and the first thing she said was "Tall" (haha we are definitely related).  When I asked her to list some personality traits, she said "A nice guy.  A Boy Scout, always prepared. A guy with a brain.  Who doesn't smoke cigarettes."  I left out the Boy Scout part, because I don't think being a literal Boy Scout is an actual requirement, but I included the rest as is.  I love the Mom quality of it!

So she says that we're looking for a nice guy, how will that match up with the guys that actually get picked?  Will the Boy Scouts of OkCupid prevail?

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